I’ve always had problems praying for people.
Not that I don’t want to pray for them, but sometimes i feel its like a gamble.
A gamble per say, because I can commit the person and their plans/issues to God,
but its really up to God as to what happens. And when things seem to go the direct opposite
from my prayers, I find it hard to explain (both to the person I prayed for and to myself).
“WHY! WHY! WHY! WHY!!??”
“It sounds like a good plan to answer the prayer>.<?”
For a lack of a better phrase, it kinda made me “look bad”.
I get afraid that people would judge the particular circumstance of whether “did God show up”, as a conclusion
to whether “is God there”.
There are times I even wonder ” would things have been different if I didn’t pray about it?” (or at least not out loud
for people to hear).
It’s pretty frustrating to see and consider that people are “taking note” of the times God seems to be “MIA”.
Frustrating because I know that God isn’t MIA.
Frustrating because I know that things are always not how we see it. Our little perspectives are
far smaller than the bigger view and plan that God is executing.
Frustrating because I truly know and believe and have experienced these before, but I don’t know
how to express and convey this truth to people.
Frustrating because when I try to explain and speak of what I know to be true, it comes out sounding
all “dodgy” and “loop-holed” and “unconvincing”.
(people look at it like a debate, although i never meant for people to see it as such. I’ll lose hands down to debates anytime!)
A day or two later, I managed to locate my Bible (after all that Spring Cleaning), and started from where I left off.
The Book of Jeremiah.
I don’t know how coincident was coincidence, but the portion I started reading from seemed to be very relative
to what I was feeling the past few days.
The people were in a desperate situation. They were vulnerable to the coming attack by the Babylonians. They asked Jeremiah
to pray to God.
“Please hear our petition and pray to the LORD your God for this entire remnant.
For as you now see, though we were once many, now only a few are left.
3 Pray that the LORD your God will tell us where we should go and what we should do.”
(Jer 42:2-3)
Jeremiah prayed and God warned them to not go to Egypt, and to stop their idolatry.
And the people said:
“You are lying! The LORD our God has not sent you to say, ‘You must not go to Egypt to settle there.’
(Jer 43:2)
Many of the Jews were worshipping foreign gods. One particular god mentioned was the “Queen of Heaven”.
Another name for her was “Ashtoreth”. Ashtoreth was known to be the goddess of Fertility/Sexuality etc.
Worship practices involved temple prostitution and sexual orgies. (you could guess from worshipping a goddess of “sexual love”).
Jeremiah continued conveying God’s message to the Jews, saying:
“Again and again I sent my servants the prophets, who said, ‘Do not do this detestable thing that I hate!’ 5 But they did not listen or pay attention; they did not turn from their wickedness or stop burning incense to other gods. ”
(Jer 44:4-5)
And the people remained stubborn to their ways replying:
16 “We will not listen to the message you have spoken to us in the name of the LORD! 17 We will certainly do everything we said we would: We will burn incense to the Queen of Heaven and will pour out drink offerings to her just as we and our ancestors, our kings and our officials did in the towns of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem. At that time we had plenty of food and were well off and suffered no harm. 18But ever since we stopped burning incense to the Queen of Heaven and pouring out drink offerings to her, we have had nothing and have been perishing by sword and famine.”
(Jer 44:16-18)
As I read this portion, I try to put myself in Jeremiah’s shoes.
“Aiyoo…Why did God make the situation seem like such? Isn’t it complicating matters?
Why can’t God do it the other way round – a more straightforward sign?”
How frustrating!!
On the other hand, the people ALSO asked to hear God, but rejected the Word immediately when it didn’t go along
with THEIR will. They accused Jeremiah of “lying”.
Blamed their situation to the fact that they stopped worshipping their foreign gods, when
the truth was that:
“Because you have burned incense and have sinned against the LORD and have not obeyed him or followed his law or his decrees or his stipulations, this disaster has come upon you, as you now see.”
(Jer 44: 23)“Not once did the people connect their disasters with their sins! Nothing is more blinding than infidelity; and the type of theological acrobat that can suppose sin to be a better benefactor than the righteousness of God is here revealed to have been a very ancient specimen, the prototype of many such theological gymnasts in our own day.
Like the harlot in Hosea, Israel “Did shamefully, and said, I will go after my lovers, that give me my bread and my water, my wool and my flax, my oil and my drink” (Hosea 2:5); and she did not know that it was her God who gave all those things she desired.”(Coffman’s Commentary)
I could understand a LITTLE more of how frustrated Jeremiah might have felt. I’d yearn and get impatient, and I’d want to
tell people “Hallo! Wrong direction! Wrong focus!” ON THE OTHER HAND, I’d also get frustrated with God.
“God why can’t you just speak to these people? Why can’t you just DO something spectacular and show yourself?”
In my situation, “God, why can’t you just answer my prayer so people might see that I’m not reciting lines into thin air?
…into a figment of my imagination?”
However, just as I could relate to Jeremiah, I see myself LIKE the Jews and the harlot too.
I put myself in the shoes of the harlot in Hosea and I think “It IS logical to see things as it is and nothing more”.
I would fail to see that God is always in the picture. That the invisible God is at work. OBVIOUSLY, my naked eye
and the smallness of my imagination and perspectives cannot SEE that!
But do I RECOGNIZE that fact? That there is something beyond what I can see?
That there is something beyond what is happening/had happened?
That I am expecting God to answer my prayer because of MY will (like the Jews)?
That just as I fear people might deem God’s seeming “MIA-ness”, as God’s absence,
I myself might have been deeming that all along?
wow. didn’t know I went one round and ended up shooting my own ass.
MeiYin, look beyond the circumstance.
Look beyond your prayer.
Look beyond your will.
For God is far beyond all those, doing a work.
A work that though I can’t see, but I can trust:).
(and kid you not, my jaw kinda dropped when I saw this FB post that I felt it was amazingly unexpectedly timely. it spoke to me.)
